Explaining Reality....or Not

The last few weeks have been difficult. Not necessarily for any one particular reason or even because Max has been sick. Rather I think my issue has been the reality of the next few months and what they hold.

Next month’s surgery is pretty much handled, emotionally, physically, and thanks to many dear people financially. I think the big issue is this summer. Max has only a very, very vague notion of the cardiac surgery looming on his horizon. Michele and I have always felt that it is not necessary to emotionally burden Max months before any medical treatment so as to cut down on his anxiety level. However, during the last few weeks Max has started to list the things he can’t wait to do this summer, including: swimming in his pool every day, playing baseball in the backyard and going to as many games as possible, and believe it or not, the first thing on his “to do” list is to go to summer school. Strangely enough this kid LOVES to go to summer school! But as I listen to him excitedly telling me about all the wonderful plans he has for his summer break my heart sinks just a little deeper. How can I explain to him that this summer will be different? That this summer is going to stink. How and when do I explain this? How can I possibly tell my son that it will be just one more school break spent in the confines of a hospital?

I don’t know how and to be honest I’m dead tired of having to explain this to Max. I know life isn’t fair and I know we all try to teach our kids this but with Max I’ve never really had to review this lesson. Max has learned the hard way that life isn’t fair. How can I explain all of this to him when I too ache for some normalcy? To watch him swim back and forth in the pool so proud of his new found swimming skills, to hear about his day at summer school, and even to toss a ball in the backyard every evening in 110 degrees (I must admit I hate this activity but would do it gladly in light of everything else).

Obviously logic has told me that there is no way I can broach this topic with Max until well after his eye surgery in a few weeks. But maybe I’m just being a coward, maybe I should just be honest the next time he brings up registering for summer school or getting tickets to the All-Star game. I really don’t know what to do but for now maybe I’ll continue my ostrich impersonation and keep my head buried in the sand…..

Scratch Boring.....

I know I've said this a million times but here goes a million and one.....when will I ever learn to keep my BIG mouth shut?

Friday evening as I came through the door from work, Max ran up to hug me and I felt as if I was being squeezed by an electric blanket. A few minutes and a thermometer later and we knew why, he was sporting a temp of 102.5. This leads me to question number one, how on earth does a kid who finished a ten day round of antibiotics less than 48 hours earlier end up sick again? Oh right, I forgot this is Max, our possibilities are endless. Endless but not always positive.

Saturday morning arrives and we're still at 102.5, have a cough, and a river of snot so off we go to the pediatrician. An exam, a swab, and 15 minutes later we have a diagnosis.....H1N1.....again! So question number two, how does the same kid get the same flu vaccine two years in a row and get the same H1N1 flu two years in a row?

We truly do need to start buying lottery tickets, the way we beat the odds time and time again leads me to believe we're owed at least one "positive" jackpot. Not just the medically impossible one.....

Business as Usual….

What a wonderful thing! I can actually report that I have very little to report. We’ve finally returned to the rhythm of our daily lives, which is definitely what we need at the moment as March draws ever near.

Max is beginning to question the actual surgical procedure for his eye surgery. The part that stumps him the most is how are they supposed to operate on his eyes if he’s asleep and his eyes are closed? Something tells me a bit of time and some googling on his part will clarify this for him. His other concern regarding March’ trip to Hopkins revolves around the ratio of doctors’ appointments to free time. He’s a busy guy with a full schedule of video game room time, eating crab cakes, and otherwise wreaking havoc. Hopefully, we will be able to set aside enough time for him to do these things.

Other than settling the few questions still on Max’s mind all tactical plans for the trip are covered, except for one small little thing – Ellie. Ellie asked several months ago if she could skip this trip because it was Spring Break and she wanted to do something fun. I can’t really blame her for wanting a diversion from all of this but right now something “fun” seems like it might just be being locked up in the kennel with the dog, a bowl of water, and a bowl of food. Somehow she isn’t clear on the fact that 15 year olds don’t get to stay home alone for ten days.

So that’s just about it at the moment, it’s really nice to be boring! Have a great weekend all!